It’s been a full few weeks. I haven’t been here much, but I’ve picked up a few lessons along the way. Not neatly packaged, just messy enough to lead me to suspect they might be real.
So I’m going to share a few of them over the next few days because I figure that if I tell you mine, you might tell me yours.
The first in a series of lessons I’ve learned while living lately…
Getting ungrounded is sometimes a way to find new territories to explore
When I flew home from Europe last week I felt as unsettled in my skin as I’ve been since I first got home from Afghanistan almost three years ago. I spent most of my first day back in Wellington crying.
Flying tends to unground us all, and for someone like me – who has a tendency to lose her connection to the earth at the best of times – ten long haul flights in three months is well over the recommended limit.
Last Tuesday I was, to say the least, deeply unsettled. I found myself questioning everything about my life: where I’m living, what I’m doing and even, to my particular distress, the people I spend my life with. It was, not to put too fine a point on it, uncomfortable.
I knew that the only thing for it was to let myself to be uncomfortable. I resisted the temptation to distract myself in the charms of the city and instead retreated to my refuge by the beach, a place of silence and stillness where whatever is troubling me always seems to become clearer, if not less uncomfortable.
And things did get clearer – with the help of a conversation with Randi Buckley, the woman who puts the ‘compassionate’ in compassionate clarity.
Things got much clearer. Somewhere in the dance between all that has been and all that is possible I managed to hear the quiet whisper of my heart and and I discovered new territories to explore.
My take-away? Discombobulation is sometimes the necessary precursor to clarity and losing our ground sometimes helps us step out into brave new worlds.